This January, in support of the Toronto Rape Crisis Centre / Multicultural Women Against Rape, friends and family have raised over $1,500 (which, when matched by my employer, totals $3,000). As a result, I now have to watch and write about thirty-one horror movies: one each night. Any donors who contributed over $30 were given the option to choose one of the horror movies I must subject myself to. After each viewing, I will write some things about said movies on this website. Be forewarned that all such write-ups will contain spoilers, and many of them will refer to unpleasant and potentially triggering situations. Today’s film is the modern feminist horror-comedy, Jennifer’s Body, directed by Karyn Kusama (Girlfight, The Invitation), written by Diablo Cody (Juno), and chosen by friend, poet, and heroic labour and human rights lawyer, Marcus McCann. I rented Jennifer’s Body from Toronto’s Queen Video.
What happens:
Trigger warnings: (implied) sexual abuse, some homophobic slurs.
Jennifer’s Body, a great little film that takes its name from a Hole song, opens with Jennifer Check (Megan Fox) in bed, watching late-night infomercials. She hears something at her window, but the scene fast-forwards to the conclusion of our story. “Hell is a teenage girl,” our narrator, Anita “Needy” Lesnicki (Amanda Seyfried), says in voice-over. Needy is now serving time in the Leech Lake Correctional Facility, dealing with various anger-management issues. “I’m a kicker,” she says. “Even says so on my chart.” Moments later, she kicks the prison dietician across the room without provocation. She’s placed into solitary confinement and recounts the events that led her to this place.
Our story begins in Devil’s Kettle, Minnesota, so named for an unusual waterfall that collects into a whirlpool that seems to funnel nowhere. Needy, something of a bookish nerd, and Jennifer, a queen bee who is cheer captain, have been friends since childhood. Despite their very different high school social standings, they hang out, call each other endearing terms like “Monistat” and “Vagisil.” Jennifer is keen to sneak into a bar (Melody Lane) to check out Low Shoulder, a band passing through town with a lead singer who is “extra salty.” Needy agrees to accompany her, though her boyfriend Chip (Johnny Simmons) warns that Melody Lane is disgusting: “Everyone in there has a moustache.”
With Chip’s criticism that she just does whatever Jennifer tells her ringing in her ears, Needy puts on a cute outfit and joins her friend at the authentically divey Melody Lane. Roman (Chris Pratt), a police cadet who Jennifer may or may not be extra-legally banging, is there, and has some homophobic comments for the members of Low Shoulder, what with their guyliner and all. Jenifer decides to make some time with the lead singer, Nikolai (Adam Brody), and offers to get them both drinks. While Jennifer is off at the bar, testing her fake ID, Needy overhears Nikolai and the bassist discussing whether Jennifer is a virgin. Needy interjects and tells them she is, in fact, a virgin, and doesn’t want anything to do with creeps like them.
The band starts their set, giving a warm thanks to the people of “Devil’s Lake” (whoops), and opens with a mediocre emo tune, “Through the Trees.”. Needy and Jennifer hold hands for the song’s duration, and Needy gazes lovingly at her friend. All of a sudden, a massive (but suspicious) fire breaks out. Flames erupt everywhere and people are trampled in the resulting panic. The Indian exchange student, Ahmed (who has a fake ID, too, I guess), is crushed by the roof. The resourceful Needy guides Jennifer out to safety though the bathroom window.
In the aftermath of the inferno, Nikolai approaches Jennifer and suggests they go somewhere safe, like his band’s van. He plies her with a measuring cup full of booze, and not even Needy is able to stop the headstrong Jennifer from hopping into his van, which disappears into the night. When she returns home, Needy calls Chip to tell him about her eventful evening. She can’t believe Jennifer left with the creeps in the band. Their phone conversation is interrupted by a ring at the doorbell. Since Needy’s mom is working the night shift, Needy is the only one around to answer the door. But no one is on the front porch.
Jennifer, looking like she’s just barely survived a car wreck, surprises Needy in the kitchen. Concerned by the volume of blood covering her friend, Needy asks what happened, but Jennifer only smiles through blood-stained teeth. She then raids Needy’s fridge and begins to devour food like a starved wolf. When Needy tries to interrupt, Jennifer screams and vomits black goo all over the floor. The goo turns crystalline – Needy later describes it as “vomit like roadkill and sewing needles” – and she laughs. Realizing something is very wrong, Needy tries to call emergency services, but her near-dead friend throws her up against the wall and hisses in her ear: “Are you scared?” Then she walks out the front door.
At school the next day, rumours fly about the Melody Lane fire. When Jennifer arrives at school, she acts like nothing strange happened overnight – she’s just her usual, self-obsessed self. (For instance, Needy shows Jennifer her terrible nails, ruined from scrubbing up black vomit all night; Jennifer simply notes, “You need a mani.”) One-handed teacher Mr. Wroblewski (J.K. Simmons in a curly wig) enters the room to mournfully announce that eight students and one Spanish teacher died in the blaze. After a sombre class, Needy tells Chip about Jennifer’s odd behaviour last night. Chip feels she should talk to the school therapist about her concerns. The two of them are stopped by the school’s emo kid, Colin Gray (Kyle Gallner), who tells Needy he’s glad she didn’t die in the fire. Chip seems just a wee bit jealous.
We next meet head jock, Jonas (Josh Emerson), who is devastated at the fiery death of his best friend, Craig. Jennifer approaches him on the football field and says she was the last person to speak to Craig. She claims Craig had mentioned that she and Jonas would make a great couple. She leads the depressed football player out to the woods to make out, and he can’t help notice how very warm she is. Neither can the woodland critters, as raccoons, foxes, beavers – all sorts of forest animals – gather round to witness their lovemaking. Jennifer removes her shirt, then undoes Jonas’s pants. Then she throws him up against a tree and her mouth unhinges like a python with shark teeth. From the parking lot, Mr. Wroblewski hears the boy scream and whispers, “Let it all out.”
From the radio, we learn that Low Shoulder are now being viewed as heroes, believed to have saved lives during the bar tragedy. Their song features in regular radio play, though they still mistakenly refer to the town as “Devil’s Lake.” Mr. Wroblewski stumbles across the mutilated remains of Jonas. A deer is busy eating his entrails when he discovers him. Needy’s mom tells her about a nightmare she had in which people were trying to crucify her daughter (“just like J.C.”), while Jennifer – in a bit of a nonsequitur / fan service – goes swimming naked in a lake.
Jennifer telephones Needy to talk about boys and how scrumptious she’s feeling, but Needy’s not in the mood. She can’t understand how Jennifer can be so bubbly and blasé given recent tragic events. Jennifer responds by scorching her tongue with a lighter and muses, “I am a God.” When she starts asking sexually invasive questions about Chip, Needy takes offence and hangs up. Chip asks Needy to meet him in a city park, where he tells her that Jonas was found ripped limb-from-limb and partially eaten. Needy has a sneaking suspicion that the fire and this death are linked somehow, but Chip is doubtful.
Another morning of the school in mourning, but Jennifer is feeling swell. Low Shoulder’s “Through the Trees” has quickly become the unofficial anthem of Devil’s Kettle’s tragedies. So much so that, one month after the fire, the band announces that 3% of the profits from the single will go to the victims’ families. When Needy scoffs that it seems a pitifully small percentage, she’s verbally attacked by her classmates. (Low Shoulder are beyond reproach.) Jennifer, meanwhile, has started to look really ill. She herself can’t help but notice her wan complexion: “It’s like I’m one of the normal girls.”
Emo Colin drops by and awkwardly asks Jennifer on a date – which is strange, as he’s never seemed interested in her before. Jennifer initially gives him a hard pass – “my dick is bigger than his” – but changes her mind once she realizes that Needy likes him. She catches up with Colin in the hall and makes plans to meet with him that evening. Later that night, Needy visits Chip while his parents are out of town: cue Teen Makeout City! Things get hot and heavy while Colin, in a seemingly abandoned part of town, tries to find Jennifer’s address. (He’s gussied himself up like Beetlejuice going to prom.) Chip and Needy seem ready for true-blue intercourse, and while they prepare to lose their virginities, Colin enters a house that seems to be under construction, looking for Jennifer. Upstairs, she’s created a love den, complete with lit candles set upon massive tarps.
Jennifer eventually enters – super-thirsty (“You give me such a wettie”) – and Colin begins to have second thoughts. “Do you even know my last name?” he asks. Then Jennifer’s eyes turn reptilian and he backs away. But it’s too late. Jennifer breaks his wrist. While in a much more loving relationship, Chip and Needy are going all the way, Jennifer – in silhouette – is tearing Colin apart with her teeth. Needy begins to have mid-sex nightmare visions of death and blood. She screams just before Chip climaxes. We see Jennifer drinking blood from the open wound in the body of Colin Gray – later described as similar to “lasagna with teeth.”
With a premonition that something terrible has happened, Needy hops into her car and drives to Jennifer’s place. Along the way, she nearly hits her friend, standing wild and bloody in the middle of the street. Needy spins out of control and Jennifer leaps onto the hood of the car. Needy loses Jennifer and speeds back home. After calming down a bit, Needy realizes the moment when Jennifer changed: something must have happened when she left in the van with that band. Needy will figure out what to do, but first she needs some rest. She slides into bed and is shocked to find Jennifer already there in her almost-pyjamas.
Jennifer harkens back to memories of former slumber parties and – using her demonic powers of seduction – lures Needy into a little French kissing. They neck on her bed for a while before Needy regains her composure and demands to know what’s going on. Jennifer explains: Low Shoulder were agents of Satan. She recalls the night she left in their van. Jennifer begins to worry they’ll sexually assault her and tries to emphasize she’s a virgin (as if this would make some sort of difference). When they stop the van in the forest by the waterfall, she tries to run away, but they restrain her. But it’s not sexual assault they have in mind; it’s sacrifice to the Devil.
Using directions for a ritual they found online, Low Shoulder will sacrifice a virgin in return for fame and fortune. “Do you know how hard it is to make it as an indie band?” Nikolai shouts. To add insult to injury, they regale her with a rendition of Tommy Tune’s “Jenny / 867-5309” while stabbing her to death with a Bowie knife.
When the ritual is complete, Nikolai hurls the knife into the falls and the band leaves. But the ritual didn’t kill her. Jennifer wakes up covered in blood and heads back to find Needy, which is when she vomits in her kitchen. Later that night, she runs into exchange student Ahmed and – realizing everyone thinks he’s dead – makes him her first victim. Back in Needy’s bedroom in the present, Jennifer crows that when she’s full, she’s invincible. To prover her point, she cuts open her forearm with a pencil and it heals almost immediately. But when Needy asks “full of what?,” Jennifer gets defensive. Unwilling to broach questions about her new diet, she leaps out Needy’s window and heads home.
Following Colin Gray’s funeral, Needy does some research in the school library’s Occult action. She discovers that demons are weakest when hungry, and can be destroyed by piercing their hearts. (Seems like valuable information for later.) The school formal is just around the corner, and Chip buys tickets for himself and Needy. But Needy can’t go to the dance with him. She outlines the Jennifer situation to her boyfriend: “Jennifer is evil.” When Chip agrees, Needy realizes she’ll have to specify the demonic element of her evil. Needy says Low Shoulder tried to sacrifice a virgin, but Jennifer hasn’t been a virgin for a while. Instead, they transferred a demon into her – a demon with sexual pheromones who feeds on young men. The school dance will be an all-you-can-eat buffet!
Chip can’t believe what he’s hearing; his main takeaway is that his girlfriend doesn’t want to go to formal with him. Needy explains she needs to be on watch at the dance; it can’t be a date. The night of the formal, Chip’s mom arms him with pepper spray. Jennifer’s prep, meanwhile, involves picking up all the hair that’s fallen out. She needs to feed. At the formal, Needy stands as a sentinel in an amazing dress and bouffant hairstyle, but finds no sign of her old friend. That’s because she’s busy stalking Needy’s boyfriend, Chip, who’s making his way to the formal via the darkened park. She hails him and they start to converse.
Jennifer lies to Chip and tells him that Needy and Colin were “porking on a semi-regular basis.” Using her demonic charms, she convinces Chip that she’s always cared about him and they soon start to kiss. Back at the dance, Mr. Wroblewski introduces a special treat: a performance from now-superstar band Low Shoulder. The crowd loves it, but it drives Needy out of the dance hall. Jennifer, meanwhile, demands that Chip say she’s better than Needy, but Chip is confused as to why. Almost as if they’re telepathically connected, Needy instantly realizes Jennifer is after Chip! She runs outside to find him.
Chip and Jennifer, meanwhile, have absconded to the abandoned community pool, scummed over with algae. They kiss some more, but Chip eventually puts a stop to it. Jennifer flies into a rage and tosses him into the pool. She attacks. Needy finds his corsage in the park and hears a scream from the derelict pool house. She scales the wall and enters through the window. When she arrives, Jennifer is busy tearing Chip’s neck into a gory mess with her knife-like teeth. Needy leaps into the pool and plunges Jennifer’s head underwater.
When Jennifer retaliates, Chip tosses his girlfriend the pepper spray and Needy uses it immediately. Jennifer then levitates into the air, which doesn’t faze Needy: “She’s just hovering. It’s not that impressive.” Needy then declares that Jennifer was never a good friend and begins to tear her down, targeting her various insecurities. Jennifer loses her cool and lunges at Needy, and that’s when Chip impales Jennifer with a massive pole. It only slows her down though, and she soon removes the pole and staggers out the window. Chip, in very rough shape, apologizes to Needy for not believing her. Needy tries to call an ambulance on Chip’s waterlogged phone in a panic, but it won’t work. He declares his love for Needy, then dies (!). (It’s quite sad.)
The film then cuts to where we began: Jennifer in bed, watching late-night informercials and circling boys she wants to eat in the yearbook. Needy crashes through the window and leaps on Jennifer. Jennifer bites her, but Needy unsheathes her weapon with a killer line: “You know what this is for? Cutting boxes!” Jennifer levitates and the two struggle mid-air until Needy rips off the ‘BFF’ necklace she bought Jennifer. Jennifer falls from the air and Needy lands on top of her, driving the boxcutter deep into her heart.
The threat is over. But Jennifer’s mom walks into the bedroom at that very moment, sees Needy with a blade in her daughter’s chest, and screams. Needy, now in prison, says she’s a totally different person now. Not just in her violent outbursts, but – since being bitten by Jennifer – she now has certain powers herself. For instance, she can levitate. And she’s super-strong, as she demonstrates by busting her way out of the prison.
On her way home from the prison, she discovers the secret spot where the Devil’s Kettle whirlpool empties out and finds Low Shoulder’s Bowie knife. She hitchhikes her way to a Low Shoulder concert – their last, she says. The credits roll to the sounds of Hole’s “Violet,” We watch as film footage of Low Shoulder partying in their hotel gives way to crime scene photos of their murders.
Takeaway points:
- Though Jennifer’s Body is, essentially, a movie about a succubus that eats boys, it’s really more about female friendship. This much is clear the moment Needy interrupts Jennifer from eating Chip: the conflict turns from “stop eating my boyfriend” to “you were never a good friend.” Chip falls by the wayside as years of resentment and bad blood between the frenemies bubbles up. Needy realizes that – just as Chip accused – she’s been doing whatever Jennifer tells her to do. The two girls then attack each other’s weak points. We realize that, though Needy wears glasses (but still looks like Amanda Seyfried) and hasn’t had much sexual experience, Jennifer is the insecure one! (That old trope.) She wishes she had good grades and that people liked her without her having to use laxatives to keep thin. Jennifer’s Body is Mean Girls with a Satanic filter .
- After its initial box-office flop, Jennifer’s Body has been reclaimed as a queer horror film, and you can see why. Needy’s interest in Jennifer seems, at times, more than you’d normally see in a BFF. More like bisexual obsession. She holds Jennifer’s hand and looks longingly at her during the concert. Saves her life on a couple occasions by acting the white knight to her damsel in distress. Needy and Jennifer are constantly teasing each other about being lesbian lovers – Chip complains about Jennifer stealing his girlfriend frequently. They even make out pretty serious-wise. For goodness sake, Amanda Seyfried’s character is named Needy Lesnicki. And if you’re a woman who’s into Megan Fox, this movie has more than enough eye candy for you. But I fear there’s a bit too much casual usage of “fag” and bit too much oppressive heteronormativity to make me reconsider this as a queer classic. (I mean, really – stealing boyfriends?) Don’t get me wrong; it’s an excellent film with a few definite bi moments. But A Nightmare on Elm Street 2 or The Hunger it is not.
- If the horror films I’ve been watching can impart one important message, let it be this: never trust boys in a band. Obviously, a bunch of whiny emo boys are going to pull a Faustian bargain for fame. And you’d better believe they’re not going to make any sacrifice themselves for it. They’ll take it out on their fans. Never trust a man in a band. Especially if he looks up to Adam Levine.
- Though I remember viscerally loathing Diablo Cody’s quirk-tastic dialogue in Juno, I thought it worked remarkably well in this film. Why didn’t people love this movie?
Truly terrifying or truly terrible?: Jennifer’s Body is not a scary movie, nor does it really aim to be. Rather, it’s a dark teen comedy along the lines of Heathers that uses horror as its medium. And it’s pretty great at that.
Best outfit: Needy Lesnicky’s prom look has to be seen to be believed.
Best line: “Or do you want to be rich and awesome … like that guy from Maroon 5.” – Nikolai, with a convincing argument for Satanic sacrifice.
Best kill: Needy plunging a box-cutter into Jennifer’s titular body was great.
Unexpected cameo: One of everyone’s favourite three or four Chrises, Chris Pratt, makes a very brief appearance as Jennifer’s police cadet hook-up, Roman. And I was delighted to see that Needy’s mom was played by national treasure, Amy Sedaris. Inexplicably, genre stalwart Lance Henriksen portrays the driver who picks up a hitchhiking Needy at the very end.
Unexpected lesson learned: Be sure to identify the closest fire exit when you enter any concert venue.
Most suitable band name derived from the movie: Though the film features a fictional band called “Low Shoulder,” that’s not the best band name in Jennifer’s Body That honour goes to Snowflake Queen.
Next up: Goodnight, Mommy (2014).